Fifty on Friday #4

I'm close to the halfway point, and enjoying this the more that I do it. These questions were actually answered on paper a couple of days ago, because these questions make me think more and more. I couldn't contain it this time, so I opened up the questions on my browser, and made a hand-written copy of this week's Fifty on Friday!

#34: Have you ever been with someone, said nothing, and walked away feeling like you just had the best conversation ever?
I think my answer to this is best communicated with a line from a song I can't stand: "We can be on the phone for three hours, not saying one word, and I would still cherish every moment". Even when Jynni and I don't say anything on the phone, or she ends up having to talk to her roommate or daughter about something while we're on the phone, I feel so at peace, so reassured by that presence on the other end of the line.

And it always feels like the best conversation we've ever had.

#35: Why do religions that support love cause so many wars?
For me, the answer is two-fold. On one hand, violent conflict is (unfortunately) a part of human nature, which we will hopefully lose as we mature, both as individuals and as a society. Conflict can drive change, and change is good, but sometimes that change is through terrible, destructive means.

The second fault can sometimes lie within the religions themselves. In most religious that I'm familiar with, especially monotheistic religions, the deity (or deities) can be jealous and vengeful -- the Christian god floods the whole world when they fall away from their worship and into ways he decides are wicked, Zeus fucked everyone after overthrowing his father Cronus, and that's just the beginning. And it's because that's the way people can be, too. Followers who can't be content with differences of opinions and beliefs attempt to force change through destructive conflict.

#44: When is it time to stop calculating risk and rewards, and just go ahead and do what you know is right?
Before it's too late. It's kind of a clichéd answer, to be sure, but that doesn't make it any less of a vali one. When it comes down to it, it's sometimes important to trust your instincts rather than your brain.

I'm very much a "what if...?" guy. I try to account for every negative possibility before I do something, just in case. Taking that slightly-neurotic point-of-view into account, it kind of amazes me that I've done some things -- like travel to New Jersey and crash on Matt's couch, when he could've been a serial killer planning to wear a Justin-style skinsuit. Or sharing a hotel room with Nate when he visited, even though he could've cut off my ear for some freaky Australian ear-necklace or something.

When your instinct tells you to go for something, sometimes it's a good idea to go for it. Stop wondering "what if?" and just do it.

#3: If life is so short, why do we do so many things we don't like and like so many things we don't do?
Time. And money.

It's really that simple, in some situations. When we do things we don't like, it's because we view them as necessities. I like having a roof over my head, so I work at Murphy's to pay rent, which is an unpleasant necessity.

As far as not doing things that we do like, that's where the "time" part comes in. We spend so much time dealing with those "necessities" that we don't make time for the things that make us happy. For a while, I described my days as "I work and sleep" when anyone asked, acting like that was all that I had time to do. Now, I include "writing" in that, because it makes me happy. I make time to really enjoy the music in my collection, too.

#48: What do you love? Have any of your recent actions openly expressed this love?
I'm kind of amused that this question followed the last. If we're going with "what" instead of "who", I'll forsake answers like "my friends and family", and go elsewhere...

I love the feeling of creating something new. It's part of why I write, and cook, and bake, and even part of why I've tried contributing to Karaoke Ring Of Death from time to time. When it comes to writing, I love my characters, even some of the darker, twisted ones. And music drives my everything.

As far as recent actions, the increased amount of writing I'm doing now, compared to even just a month or two ago, kind of speaks for itself. And I take some of my CDs to work to listen to some of the time, which has actually helped me find new and interesting people by who reacts well to the music.